A little too much "Power Yoga" and I found myself left not quite so bendy. A little ice, a little recouping and I went from sore to in serious pain. I have been no stranger to back pain and have a diagnosis that is less than stellar when it comes to the medical state of my back. I do not deny the reality of this, but I do chose to, however, walk in the healing already attained for me through Christ. So to find myself in severe pain and slightly disabled yet AGAIN left me frustrated and angry...with myself...
As I said, I fully believe in the completed work of the cross and I know that it is by His stripes I am healed. I walk by this faith and have experienced His manifested healing in my own body more times than I can count (many times my back) and have witnessed literally thousands of people at a time receive miraculous healings. God is The Healer and He STILL heals...these things I know. My frustration came in feeling that I keep making myself "unhealed" and seriously wondering if this frustrates my Healer. I know, in retrospect, this sounds ridiculous but the only "dad" I knew always seemed bothered/frustrated by my existence so I can STILL revert to wrongly associating my Father with what I've known. Honestly, I didn't even really realize I had been grasping onto this "stinkin thinkin" until it was revealed to me, not through a correcting/condemning word, but through an affirmation of His love...
I decided I had tolerated enough of the pain that I had "earned" through my zealous working out and asked Him what to do about it. There are many good and practical things one can do for a back injury and believe me throughout the past eight years I have tried many (ironically including the working out to lose extra weight)and so I was prepared for whatever direction He gave. He led me to His Word-"Is any sick among you? Let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord; and the prayer of faith shall save the sick, and the Lord shall raise him up" (James 5:14) As a "mature Christian" my pride and foolishness began arguing with God that I should be able to "get healed" on my own...(I later wondered where it says THAT in the Bible). Now, I'm not saying we can't be healed alone, we can, I have...but if God's Word leads you to an act of obedient faith, especially after asking Him to do so, we (I) ought to learn to pay attention. So I did...
After a meeting at my Pastor's house I humbled myself and asked for prayer. They anointed me with oil, laid hands on me and the first words out of my Pastor's mouth were, "He delights to heal you". Not, "He is frustrated with having to heal you AGAIN"..or, "what a bother you are to be asking AGAIN"...or, "can't you for once keep the healing I already gave you???" As I exhaled and repositioned my body, all pain melted and audible "pops" were heard as He began readjusting my body and my mind. To Him be all the glory!!!
He delights (enjoys and takes pleasure) in healing me. He delights IN US, His children. He delights to heal YOU...TODAY. And as Bill Johnson likes to say, He gives you permission to be healed right... NOW!
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Monday, October 3, 2011
pigtails and His presence...
I had one of the most profound personal encounters with my Jesus this morning and I'm still in that "mesmerized-reflective" state that such an encounter will leave you in. I was attending a conference and we were encouraged to take a few moments, relax, and imagine Jesus walking towards us. I did as told and began to imagine Him approaching me, and He did... in just a few brief seconds, it stopped being simply my imagination and became a supernatural encounter that just blew me away!
I began to experience a vision of Jesus walking towards me, taking my hair down and putting it in pigtails. (Which confirmed a word shared during a night of prayer this week about God seeing us ladies as His little girls- pigtails, pretty dresses and all.) I began to try and tell Him that "He knew I always hated being a little girl..." and all the reasons why, but I couldn't speak. He leaned over, whispering in my ear "Kimmy". Again I tried to speak, angrier than before, and tell Him that I despised that name. And again I could articulate no words. He grabbed my hand and in that instant, EVERY trace of that anger disintegrated...
He began to skip and because He had my hand, I went along. He took me to a flower garden. As He opened the gate, we were sucked in like a vacuum by the irresistible beauty. My senses heightened as I encountered the colors, scents, and even songs of the lush growth. Flowers I'd never seen in any location or book engulfed us. It was truly breath-taking. There was a radiance that pulsed from each blossom and the air was an intoxicating, sweet perfume...
We approached a low bench, with room for only one. He sat and instinctively I sat on His lap, looked up at Him in sheer joy, exhaled, and laid my head on His chest. As soon as I did, I became aware that I had "melted" into Him and He and I were now one. He began to point out the awe-inspiring beauty of our surroundings and laying there with my eyes peacefully shut I agreed. Then, drawing my attention, He looked me in the soul and began to speak words I have "heard" many many times before but this time I received them as truth, and it set me utterly free at a level I can't even begin to describe... "You are exceedingly more radiant (than these flowers). Your fragrance overwhelms My heart, allures, and captivates my attention. The sound of your being, your very presence, fills My ears and brings My heart joy." I was rendered, yet again, speechless...
Then together, we began to observe this one particularly magnificent flower bud begin to slowly blossom as if responding to some divine invitation to do so. We were totally captivated and overjoyed at the simple process as petal after petal began to stretch outward and upwards. "Kim, do the same. I love it. Open up to me. I love your blooming. You are altogether lovely." And I felt my heart responding and releasing its unveiled beauty. And I, His beloved daughter, sat there basking in His affirmation, thankful to be in pigtails and His presence...
I began to experience a vision of Jesus walking towards me, taking my hair down and putting it in pigtails. (Which confirmed a word shared during a night of prayer this week about God seeing us ladies as His little girls- pigtails, pretty dresses and all.) I began to try and tell Him that "He knew I always hated being a little girl..." and all the reasons why, but I couldn't speak. He leaned over, whispering in my ear "Kimmy". Again I tried to speak, angrier than before, and tell Him that I despised that name. And again I could articulate no words. He grabbed my hand and in that instant, EVERY trace of that anger disintegrated...
He began to skip and because He had my hand, I went along. He took me to a flower garden. As He opened the gate, we were sucked in like a vacuum by the irresistible beauty. My senses heightened as I encountered the colors, scents, and even songs of the lush growth. Flowers I'd never seen in any location or book engulfed us. It was truly breath-taking. There was a radiance that pulsed from each blossom and the air was an intoxicating, sweet perfume...
We approached a low bench, with room for only one. He sat and instinctively I sat on His lap, looked up at Him in sheer joy, exhaled, and laid my head on His chest. As soon as I did, I became aware that I had "melted" into Him and He and I were now one. He began to point out the awe-inspiring beauty of our surroundings and laying there with my eyes peacefully shut I agreed. Then, drawing my attention, He looked me in the soul and began to speak words I have "heard" many many times before but this time I received them as truth, and it set me utterly free at a level I can't even begin to describe... "You are exceedingly more radiant (than these flowers). Your fragrance overwhelms My heart, allures, and captivates my attention. The sound of your being, your very presence, fills My ears and brings My heart joy." I was rendered, yet again, speechless...
Then together, we began to observe this one particularly magnificent flower bud begin to slowly blossom as if responding to some divine invitation to do so. We were totally captivated and overjoyed at the simple process as petal after petal began to stretch outward and upwards. "Kim, do the same. I love it. Open up to me. I love your blooming. You are altogether lovely." And I felt my heart responding and releasing its unveiled beauty. And I, His beloved daughter, sat there basking in His affirmation, thankful to be in pigtails and His presence...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)