Recently I had the opportunity to preach at church on the Holy Spirit and how often times experiencing His power is contingent on one word: surrender. Surrender is one of those tricky words that we often think we've got all figured out, until, that is, we realize we're not as surrendered as we might like to believe. If you're tracking with me here it's most likely because we are kindred personalities.
So what is surrender? What does surrender look like? Perhaps a better question is what isn't surrender? My pastor describes surrender somewhat this way, "surrender with conditions is no surrender at all." I'm not sure about you but I've found my "surrender" to be quite conditional more times than I care to admit. I don't wink at my stubborn tendencies and neither do I excuse them. Resistance, in any form, to the Holy Spirit is both grieving and foolish.
When faced with the cross, Jesus asked His Father to "let this cup pass from me." Today, faced with a cross of my own, I admit that I too am asking Him to take a cup from me that seems far too much for me to bear. The contents of it truly seems too impossible to swallow. Yet, as Jesus prayed, I can't deny that somewhere from within, my heart cries a surrendered, "nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will."
There are times that Love requires us to go where we can't imagine being able to go. There are times that Love requires us to do what we never imagined being able to do...this might just be one of those times.
As I process and wrestle with myself to accept His invitation to take up my cross and follow Him, He assures me that He is with me and there is even more victory on the other side of surrender...
